Crunk for Jesus

I've made it halfway through Lent. 

I'll Be Waiting

Dear Pepsi,


It's only been four days since we last saw each other. Today was Daylight Saving Time. I could have really used your refreshing ice cold embrace to cope with the hour we lost. My meals just aren't the same without you to wash the food down. My body aches with withdrawal pains. I'm beyond thirsty and flat water just won't do. Chickadee even watches people's throats as they swallow (Sh!t My Mama Do).


Thirty-six more days until we meet again. I'll be waiting.


P.S. I went to a black funeral and you KNOW they served fried chicken. I was strong and ate the baked chicken instead. It wouldn't have tasted right anyway without you.

Take It All

Bare with me, dolls & gents. Be my strength, sweet baby Jesus. Lent has officially started (March 9 - April 17). I chose to sacrifice my top five vices:

Pepsi 

Fried Foods 

Makeup Purchases 

 Carry-out  

Dine-in 

I'll certainly be healthier and have a clearer mind without my liquid crack, deep fryer, and non home-cooked meals. My pocketbook will be heavier without indulging in makeup collections. But my neck? It may be tore up from scratching like a crackhead in the next 40 days. L Biggums, is that you?

I'm Fancy, Huh?

I got an award! **slides down the pole, lands in chinese splits, dougies with Tagalongs & Samoas, throws pink confetti, then taps the mic and begins acceptance speech. I'd like to thank God, my Mama...** 


The Stylish Blogger award was bestowed upon me by Yves, the authoress. Of course there are strings attached. I have to reveal seven random facts about myself and recommend a list of bloggers that I feel are worthy of this award. What an honor! So here it goes...


Random Facts about L. Marie
1. I've had migraines since the tender age of four, and have taken medication to prevent migraines since the age of eleven. I really don't know life without the pain of a headache. Pretty sad, huh?
2. I'm an unhealthy eater. Every meal includes additives like salt, butter, black pepper, gravy, sauce, etc. Every meal ends with a dessert too. I know my eating habits have to improve, but I'm not ready for such a drastic lifestyle change.
3. There are random moments that I miss Corporate America. Well, it's the steady, hefty paycheck that I miss. It's been almost 2.5 years since leaving and I still haven't fully adjusted. Although, my stress level has significantly decreased and my happy level is high.
4. Whenever my gas tank is near empty, I turn off the radio and heat/air conditioning. There is no logic behind it, but somehow I feel it helps to preserve gas.
5. I'm a mean girl. In about 50 more years, I'll be that old bitty sitting on the front porch sitting sweet tea talking about my neighbors fuckery.
6. I recently started tracing my ancestry and haven't found any Africans yet. So far, my roots are Irish. I've lived my entire life as a Black American. Depending on the ancestry results, it may just be self-proclaimed.
7. I'm a really private person. Only close friends and family know selective details about my everyday life. So this blogmoir is quite a challenge.


Other Fancy Bloggers Worthy of Award:
1. Dame
2. Eclectik
3. Kim
4. Steph
5. Spinks
6. Cande
7. Diva V
8. Brooks
9. Marq

My President Is Black (Remix) ~ Jay-Z

(Sing along in honor of Presidents' Day)

My President is black

In fact he's half white

So even in a racist mind

He's half right

If you have a racist mind

You be aight

My President is black

But his house is all white

Rosa Parks sat so Martin Luther could walk

Martin Luther walked so Barack Obama could run

Barack Obama ran so all the children could fly

So I'ma spread my wings 

You can meet me in the sky 

Want You To See All of the Lights

I previously mentioned in a random rant that music is everything. I've been patiently waiting for the official video to All of the Lights by Kanye West featuring fitty lem artists (Rihanna, Sir Elton John, Kid Cudi, John Legend, Tony Williams, Alicia Keys, La Roux's Elly Jackson, The Dream, Ryan Leslie, Alvin Fields, Fergie, Charlie Wilson, and Ken Lewis). The video is directed by Hype Williams. Um, it just has a lot of lights. I'm also annoyed that Fergie's vocal part is eliminated. Either the budget was low, or this is another of Kanye's artistic moments that went over my head. Or maybe he simply wanted us to see all of the lights, like the song says. Check it out below and share your two cents.

Still crossing my fingers for a live Grammy performance in 2012 with less lights, but ALL of the artists. It really is the best collaboration to date.

Sh!t My Mama Do ~ Ch. 2

Of the many talents that my Mama is blessed with, dream interpretation is the most beneficial. Yes, she has the gift to interpret dreams. She doesn't use reference books either. The meaning of a dream and its corresponding numeric definition is all stored in her brain. What is the corresponding numeric definition, you ask? Basically, the 3- or 4-digit lottery number. You may be confused so let me break it down.


The average person has 3-5 dreams per night. The person may or may not remember them upon waking up. For those of us who do remember the dream, it leaves us wondering what it means. This is where Chickadee comes in. Simply tell her your dream and she will interpret it. She then translates it into a lottery number. It is up to the dreamer whether or not to play it. 


This, dolls and gents, is a gift. For Chickadee, she is "just looking for that number." For others, it gives insight to what a dream means and possibly a small fortune. I personally don't remember my dreams every night. For the dreams that do stand out, I ask her to interpret and then play it in the lottery. About 90% of my dreams fall in the lottery and its interpretation happens in real life, so best believe I take advantage. The sh!t my mama do pays!


Now excuse me while I go play midday.